There is a way to completely restore a failing relationship with a new modality that until now was not thought possible. To learn what is required you may wish to read this article.
If two individuals are intent on trying one last time to make their relationship work then there is a way. A relationship is just like a person. It stores within it the sum total of all the memories that make it up. After all when individuals talk about their relationship what do they talk about if it?s not what happened to them i.e. their history. It is the same history that each partner uses against the other and against the relationship to justify why it is worth leaving. Without such information one would be hard pressed to make a case for or against a relationship. This would present a clean slate from which to create something totally fresh, would it not?
Now I know that you?re probably thinking that this sounds a bit dubious at best. I would like to let you know that I have worked with individuals this way for over ten years with very promising results so please try to keep an open mind as you read on.
Now just a word of caution here first. Individuals who enter into a relationship always bring with them the history of their lives that preceded that relationship. This history includes other relationship experiences which are either helpful or not.
In order for a failing relationship to start afresh it also becomes necessary to address destructive relational patterns that already pre-existed in each individual.
Even if a divorce takes place it becomes imperative that the corresponding individuals address this history adequately so that they don”t carry it into the next relationship.
When this happens history tends to repeat itself and in the process consumes an individual’’s life leaving them sad, untrusting and cynical.
So in order to redeem a current failing relationship three things are necessary:
1. Two individuals in integrity who are committed to trying again.
2. The effective release of the negative memories of the current relationship from the minds/bodies of each individual.
3. The effective release of any negative relational patterns that each individual brought into the relationship at its inception.
Part 1 must come from the individuals. Here love is the key to integrity and commitment. If its there great. If not it becomes exceedingly more difficult to make this work.
Parts 2 and 3 can be addressed quickly and easily with a new process called the Mind Resonance Process(TM) (MRP).
MRP helps individuals clear all traumatic memories that the couple hold within them.
It is just such memories that fuel negative feelings against the other and against the continuation of the relationship itself.
Such memories can be released in a way that helps restore the genuine love that the individuals had for each other initially.
What’’s more it can facilitate the necessary emotional growth that such individuals needed before they even entered this relationship.
So what is being said here is that not only are they able to start afresh, they become more capable and mature individuals.
This makes the fresh experience more rewarding and the new relationship more resilient.
If you and your partner are going through a tough time and you feel inspired to experience what MRP can do for you kindly visit the web link below and consider arranging an introductory consultation
Dr. Nick Arrizza is trained in Chemical Engineering, Business Management & Leadership, Medicine and Psychiatry. He is an Energy Psychiatrist, Healer, Key Note Speaker,Editor of a New Ezine Called “Spirituality And Science” (which is requesting high quality article submissions) Author of “Esteem for the Self: A Manual for Personal Transformation” (available in ebook format on his web site), Stress Management Coach, Peak Performance Coach & Energy Medicine Researcher, Specializes in Life and Executive Performance Coaching, is the Developer of a powerful new tool called the Mind Resonance Process(TM) that helps build physical, emotional, mental and spiritual well being by helping to permanently release negative beliefs, emotions, perceptions and memories. He holds live workshops, international telephone coaching sessions and international teleconference workshops on Physical. Emotional, Mental and Spiritual Well Being.
Business URL #1: http://www.telecoaching4u.com
Personal URL: http://www.telecoaching4u.com/Spirituality_And_Science.htm
According to a legal dictionary, a tort is a private or civil wrong or injury that results “from a breach of a legal duty that exists by society’s expectations regarding interpersonal conduct, rather than by a contract or other private relationship.”
Every lawsuit has something called elements that must be present to sustain a cause of action. In a tort action, the following elements must be present:
- there must be a legal duty owed by a defendant to a plaintiff, and
- breach of that duty, and
- a causal relation between the defendant’s conduct and the resulting damage to the plaintiff.
A marital tort comes from incidents or behaviors that occurred between spouses, and sometimes third parties, during the marriage, even during the pendency of a divorce suit and possibly afterward in certain circumstances.
Some examples of a suit that could be brought as a marital tort action are:
- assault and battery
- rape
- spoliation of evidence, negligent and/or intentional
- infliction of emotional distress, negligent and/or intentional
- transmission of a venereal disease
- interference with custody
- harassment
- fraud
- invasion of privacy, wiretap
- false imprisonment
- conversion
Ex-spouses aren’t the only people at risk of being a party to a marital tort action. For example, if the underlying tort is fraud or spoliation of evidence for hiding assets, lying about the value of assets, or transferring assets to deprive a spouse from having the asset included in the marital or community estate during a dissolution of marriage, anyone who assisted in the wrongful activity is at risk. It could be an accountant, a bookkeeper, a lawyer, a stockbroker, a family member or a friend.
In addition to tort claims, some people have been successful bringing cases under the federal Racketeer Influenced and Corrupt Organizations Act (RICO), 19 U.S.C. Sections 1961-68. This permits a plaintiff to sue for treble damages and attorneys fees. Some examples of behavior that might be addressed in a RICO suit are a spouse using marital assets improperly or concealing the true amount of income during a divorce.
An option that may exist for some plaintiffs involves the federal Violence Against Women Act of 2000 (VAWA) where the plaintiff can ask for compensatory and punitive damages and attorneys fees. The elements to a VAWA action are: The defendant committed a crime of violence that rose to the level of a felony and the conduct was gender-motivated. The defendant doesn’t have to be charged with a crime and the defendant’s behavior doesn’t have to be classified as a felony in the state where the act occurred.
An interesting area of law is developing in the area of wiretapping and the illegal interception of communications. There are federal and state laws about wiretapping and what may be legal in one state, isn’t in another, or isn’t in federal court. Some examples of communication interception that may be the basis for a suit are: telephone wiretaps, eavesdropping on cellular communications, eavesdropping on cordless phone conversations, downloading your spouse’s e-mail files, getting records of your spouse’s conversations on Internet chat rooms, or intercepting beeper messages.
Spoliation of evidence might be brought when a spouse has destroyed documents that would support a claim about real estate ownership or other interests in real estate. Not all states recognize this cause of action.
Many divorce lawyers do not discuss marital tort actions with their clients. Some lawyers who specialize in this field of law believe that when a divorce lawyer fails to explore the possibility of a martial tort action with a client, that the lawyer has committed malpractice. If you believe that your spouse may be liable to you for his or her past and present actions, bring it to the attention of your lawyer by asking, “Can we talk about whether I can file a marital tort action against my spouse?”
Don’t wait until the divorce is over to ask that question. In some states a marital tort must be joined with the divorce action. If you don’t bring it at the same time as the divorce, you lose forever the right to pursue the marital tort. Other states permit the tort action to be joined with the divorce but don’t require it. Other states don’t allow the tort action and divorce action to be joined at all. Still other states don’t permit marital tort actions. In others, the courts don’t really know what to do with marital torts, especially when the divorce is always a judge-tried case and the marital tort action can be tried by a jury. Be sure to ask your lawyer to explain the law of your state regarding marital torts.
There are some benefits from joining a marital tort with the divorce. The total expenses for legal fees and costs of litigation are reduced. The evidence in the divorce case can be used in the tort case. There are also some disadvantages to joining a divorce and a tort action. If the divorce action is tried by a judge instead of a jury, and the divorce judge also makes the decision in the tort action, the potential award from the tort may be much less than what a jury would award. In addition, a judge may not award the victim as much as he or she could get in a divorce action because of the award in the tort action.
The problem with many marital tort actions is that there isn’t anyone to sue who has enough money to make pursuit of the action worthwhile–it’s the “deep pocket” problem. Many potential suits aren’t filed simply because the defendant doesn’t have sufficient assets or income to permit the plaintiff to collect on any award, including an award for attorneys fees.
Sometimes the deep pocket problem can be addressed by bringing third party defendants into the cause of action. For example, a homeowners insurance company may pay on a claim for a negligence suit, police for failure to enforce a restraining order, an accountant for failing to disclose certain financial records, or a family member for helping to hide a child so a parent is prevented from having access to the child.
Many divorces are completed by a settlement or separation agreement. It is standard for many lawyers to have a boilerplate provision called the waiver. The purpose of the provision is that each spouse agrees that the settlement reached in the divorce acts as a complete settlement of any legal claims or issues that may arise from their marriage. This waiver provision has value if a marital tort is a potential suit or is already filed.
And, if you sign the settlement agreement with the waiver, you could be signing away your right to file a tort action from events that occurred during your marriage. You may still be able to file a tort action for events that occurred after the divorce or if the waiver is specific in nature instead of a general waiver. Check with your lawyer during settlement negotiations.
Finally, if you believe that your spouse may have a marital tort cause of action against you, discuss it with your lawyer. It is possible that you may make certain admissions or statements during deposition testimony, answers to interrogatories, or in a trial. Those admissions could be used by your spouse or ex-spouse to support a marital tort action. The same goes for any findings made by a judge regarding your conduct during the marriage.
Always discuss marital torts with your divorce lawyer. If you think that you have been a victim of your spouse’s misbehavior, describe the behavior to your lawyer and then ask, “Is that behavior the basis for a potential marital tort action?” Don’t be shy or embarrassed to tell what happened. Your lawyer needs to know so he or she can appropriately advise you of your legal rights and opportunities.
If you think that you face the risk of being the defendant in a tort suit, tell your lawyer about the behavior that you believe may put you at risk and ask, “Does that behavior put me at risk for a marital tort action, and if so, what can we do in the divorce action to protect me from it in the future?” One caveat to admitting bad behavior, especially secreting of assets or lying about income, you may find yourself looking for another lawyer.
I am not talking about criminal stalkers who truly intend to do someone harm. What I’m talking about are regular people who have a relationship end before they were ready and some of the behaviors they use in their best attempt to hold on to their partners. Has this ever happened to you?
Let’s talk about the potential dangers of what can happen. You are in a love relationship. You are happy and content most of the time. Perhaps you notice your partner’s lack of attention and possible discontent, or possibly the realization that he or she no longer loves you comes as a complete shock. Whichever is the case, the ultimate result is that your partner wants out of the relationship that was satisfying for you.
I talk to many individuals who have experienced this scenario as a total and complete shock. They had no idea. They insist there was no warning. Everything was fine and then one day. . . BOOM. The bottom fell out of their world. This experience can be completely devastating.
If this has happened to you, you know what I mean. Everything seems fine. You are happy. You have a partner in your life who meets most of your needs. You depend on that person. You imagine your future together. You take for granted that you will always be together. Then something happens that is totally out of your control and your world is shattered. What can you do?
Before we talk about what to do, it is important to really look and define what you want. Most people who are left in that situation want their lover back. They want to pinch themselves and realize they were just having a nightmare. They want their partner to love them again.
Without taking a good look at what you want, you tend to start behaving automatically. You want your life back so you start engaging in activities to try to change the other person’s mind. You cry, you rage, you depress and sometimes in desperation, you engage in what I call stalking behavior.
Your partner has told you the relationship is over. He or she is not interested in continuing your life together. Your partner doesn’t love you anymore. Well, that is completely unacceptable to you. Some of you will even imagine that the person is losing his or her mind. He might be having a midlife crisis or she may simply be experiencing PMS. Your mind kicks into denial. You simply don’t believe it.
You call your friends. Try to get them on your side to validate whatever it is you are thinking. And in sheer desperation, you start to spy on your loved one. You drive by where they work. You make unwanted phone calls, begging them to come back and give you one more chance. You start approaching their family members and friends hoping to gain some insight that you lack.
All of this is understandable when you start behaving without your goal in mind. If you don’t understand your goal is to reinstate the relationship, then your behavior seems justified. However, when you clearly define your goal, then that begs the question, “Are these behaviors that I am engaging in helping me to bring this person back into my life?”
If you can honestly see the situation, then you will have to admit that what you are choosing to do is more likely pushing your loved one away. Once you recognize this, you need to switch out of your emotional mode and move into a more logical, intellectual mode.
You need to understand a little about relationship dynamics. Until a couple truly moves into an area of mature love and relationship commitment, they tend to go through cycles. One person withdraws and the other person moves closer in an attempt to fill the gap created by the other’s withdrawal. In so doing the person attempting to fill the gap often crowds and smothers his or her partner, thus increasing the likelihood of their own rejection. It’s a vicious cycle.
What can be done about it? You must honor your partner in your relationship, while at the same time honoring yourself. You do not have the right to get your own needs met at the exclusion of your partner meeting his or her needs. When a relationship exists that is not meeting the needs of both individuals, sometimes one or both people decide it’s time to end the relationship.
The problem occurs if you don’t want the relationship to end and your partner does. What can you do? The first thing to always ask yourself is, “Whose behavior can I control?” If your partner has decided to end the relationship, is there really anything you can do to stop them? Maybe, and that’s a big maybe, you can make them feel so guilty that they will return to you. However, is guilt the foundation you want your relationship to be built upon?
I say you must honor your partner’s wishes to end a relationship gracefully if maintaining any type of future relationship is your goal. You may be able to salvage a friendship that way. It’s even possible that down the road, your partner may want to return to you once he or she realizes that you respected them enough to let them go gracefully. However, don’t let this be the reason you do so because then if it doesn’t happen, you can reengage in some crazy and potentially stalking behaviors.
You have a complete right to a fulfilling, satisfying relationship. That is true. However, you may not be able to have it with the person you’d like to have it with right now. Hold on to your vision of the future?your dream of happily ever after. Simply allow yourself the flexibility to imagine it with a different partner in your life. After all, isn’t part of your vision being in relationship with someone who loves you as much as you love them? Then your current relationship isn’t the answer.
Gracefully, let it go with the inner knowledge that you are better off for the time you spent in the relationship. It met your needs for as long as it existed and now you are on to bigger and better things. You have been freed to continue your search for a person to love you in your here and now.
Remember this quote by Dr. Seuss, “Don’t cry because it’s over; smile because it happened.”
Kim Olver has a graduate degree in counseling and works with couples and individuals who trying to deepen their understanding of their relationship patterns and to move closer to the important people in their lives. Check out her free Relationship teleclasses at http://www.therelationshipcenter.biz
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A village clerk says a marriage license for Beyonce Knowles and Jay-Z, dated April 4 and signed by the person who officiated at the wedding, is being filed with the state.
The license was received by mail last Friday, says Scarsdale Clerk Donna Conkling. She would not say who officiated.
The celebrities and their representatives had refused to confirm widespread rumors about the marriage. But there was a lavish party at Jay-Z’s Manhattan apartment on April 4, with guests including Gwyneth Paltrow and Beyonce’s former Destiny’s Child bandmates, Kelly Rowland and Michelle Williams.
The couple have apparently been dating for six years. Knowles, 26, and Jay-Z, 38, whose real name is Shawn Carter, have collaborated on the songs “‘03 Bonnie and Clyde” and “Crazy In Love.”
Learn Divorce Recovery 101 on the Web, Via E-mail and Singles Newspapers
© 2001 Harlan Jacobsen
You Need Lessons To Learn To Fly and….a hell of a lot of practice. Small easy steps over a few week span get you from Point A to Point B, a great new life of lasting happiness as a single independent person.
It will take as much effort on your part as getting ready and preparing for any trip and experience of a lifetime. Here are Seven Strategies to use to get underway.
Number One: Study and Learn your way. The one best route to take you through the Singles Jungle.
Number Two: Practice and Practice New Skills. Interact and get feedback from other singles already enroute on the same journey.
Number Three: Unlearn Undecided Old Programming. Rethink and replace inappropriate, obsolete life controlling decisions of the past.
Number Four: Develop a strong network of fellow traveler singles. Those that have a goal and destination just like yours.
Number Five: Listen To Experts. Learn what works, what to avoid and detours to skirt. Discuss and get feedback on your steps so far.
Number Six: Learn Joy and Happiness as automatic everyday experiences. Make every new thing and challenge a joy. Drop expectations and demands.
Number Seven: Goals for where you are going. Constantly move on. Grow and expand to where you want to be. You retain control of you. Expand and continue to share your life and experience along the road.
West and Phifer began dating in 2002 but briefly split in 2004. The rapper proposed in 2006.
SHE’S EVIL.COM
VISIT THE SHE’S EVIL RANT PAGE
What we’re about
Welcome to She’s Evil.com. Let’s start by telling you what we’re all about. First off, we do not hate women. We love women. Really. We REALLY love some women. But like most of you, we’ve had our different experiences with them, and let’s face it gentlemen, some of them are just plain EVIL! That’s not to say that they all are, or that all of us are perfect. (Truth is, some of us can be evil too. Not exactly breaking news) But this site is for the average guy out there, married or not, who tries to do the right things, plays by the rules (and it’s pretty clear nowadays that we didn’t write the damn rules), and just finds himself frustrated by a one-sided relationship where the woman wants more and more, believes that her needs and feelings are paramount, and doesn’t give a damn about our own wants or long-term goals.
The creators of this site are all either married or divorced, and naturally that colors our outlook. But the site is not strictly for divorced men. All are welcome, whether they are married, single, engaged, or divorced. Anybody who has experienced an evil woman. Hell, maybe even frustrated lesbians can offer something here (we’re not quite sure yet though. The jury is still out on whether people who think like you can ever agree with people who think like us). We want this to be enjoyable, and a place to vent. Get your frustrations off your chest with like minded people facing the same problems and stresses. Let off some steam in a cyber world that speaks your language. But we also aim to be a resource for men who are facing the real problems of divorce or relationship stress. We plan to post links to online resources, from legal advice to matchmaking services, that will be of assistance to men currently in bad relationships. But mostly, this is YOUR site. Log in, read what’s up here, and weigh in with your comments and experiences.
US population statistics indicate that as many as 12 million American men have experienced divorce. This is very likely the most underserved and underrepresented demographic group in our society. Child custody laws are stacked against us. Popular culture paints us as insensitive louts who deserve our miserable lot in life. Family court judges rule against us with regularity. The media paints a picture of abusive spouses and deadbeat dads. There are very few outlets that give us a voice, respect our opinions, and look out for our interests. This site aims to provide that outlet. So enjoy the ride, and get in the game. We want to hear from you, and we want the world to hear from all of us. If you want to show off your thoughts visit the She’s Evil Shop
Celebrity Divorce Stats Shortest Celebrity Marriages
Britney Spears and Jason Allen Alexander. Lasted for 55 hours.
Dennis Rodman and Carmen Electra. Lasted for 9 days in November 1998.
Mario Lopez married Ali Landry on 24 April 2004; two weeks later she had the marriage annulled.
Drew Barrymore and Jeremy Thomas, from 20 March to 28 April 1994.
Rick Rockwell and Darva Conger, married on the television program Who Wants to Marry a Multi-Millionaire February 15, 2000. Annulled April 5, 2000.
Colin Farrell and Amelia Warner, from July to November 2001.
Chad Michael Murray and Sophia Bush, married 16 April 2005, announced their separation 26 September 2005. Bush sought an annulment (citing “fraud”) in February 2006.
Jennifer Lopez and Cris Judd. Lasted 6 months.
Shannon Doherty and Ashley Hamilton. Lasted 6 months.
Axl Rose and Erin Everly, married April of 1990. Rose filed for divorce one month later, but the two made up; the marriage was annulled in January 1991.
Jennifer Lopez and Ojani Noa married on 22 February 1997, lasted 11 months
Drew Barrymore and Tom Green, married 7 July 2001, Green filed for divorce on 17 December 2001, became official 15 October 2002.
Liza Minnelli and David Gest, married from March 16, 2002 to July 25, 2003
Information provided by Wikipedia
Biggest Divorce Settlements:
$100 million* Amy Irving’s settlement from Steven Spielberg after their 34-month marriage ended.
$60 million Kenny Rogers to fourth wife Marianne
$45 million Michael Douglas to wife Diandra
$40 million Kevin Costner to Cindy, his wife of 16 years
$30 million Ted Danson to wife Casey. He left her for Whoopi Goldberg
$25 million Clint Eastwood to Maggie, his wife of 31 years
$20 million Bruce Springsteen to Julianne Phillips
$20 million Johnny Carson to third wife Joanna
$12 million Sylvestor Stallone to wife Sasha
$6 million Sylvester Stallone to Brigitte Nielsen
$3.5 million Jim Carrey to first wife Melissa Womer
$2 million Burt Reynolds to Loni Anderson
